Monday, December 19, 2011
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Childhood memories
Time flies when you are busy. It is Christmas time again and memories of childhood always pop up. When we were little kids, we went to our grandparents homes for Christmas day. Our family always went to midnight Mass, so we children had to sleep in the evening, or Santa wouldn't come. Our parents usually had friends over for cocktails, and we were supposed to sleep. (I guess we did when we were really little). When we woke up to go to Mass, Santa had somehow slipped into the living room and left our presents. We could open one before Mass, and the rest when we got home (if we had been good). Blackmail worked even in the old days. Then it was off to bed so we wouldn't be cranky the next day.
The idea was to go to one set of grandparents one year, and the other set the next year.
When I was about 6 years old, a sister of my paternal grandmother told a few stories in the family. Well that stirred my parents up. My father could always forgive anyone anything. My mother could not. She held grudges until she died. I hope I take after my father. Anyway, we didn't go to my father's parents house anymore. My father would go, but my mother kept us kids home. God works in mysterious ways. When I was 8 years old I was in church for the funeral of a classmate's father. My paternal grandparents sat right behind me in church. My mother was sitting on the other side of the church. I heard a funny noise, and later learned it was called a death rattle. My grandmother had a stroke; the first one at her side was my mother. My grandmother died in my mothers' arms. After that, my mother and father were the ones who took care of my grandfather. The persons who had stirred up the family fued were not there for him. They wanted to put my grandfather in a nursing home. Nursing homes were not like they are now, or at least what we hope they are. My parents refused, and instead hired an around the clock nurse for him, a care giver. Quillie took care of grandpa for 3 years, 6 days on and 1 day off. When it became to much for her, they hired Willy to help her. Then it became to much for them as well and my mom and dad were there too. My grandfather died 10 years after my grandmother by 1 day, January 17, my grandmother died on January 18. By then I was a freshman in high school.
During this 10 year span, Christmas dinners were held at my parents' home. All were welcome from both sides of the family. Some years there were 30 people. No dishwasher!
More stories to come.
The idea was to go to one set of grandparents one year, and the other set the next year.
When I was about 6 years old, a sister of my paternal grandmother told a few stories in the family. Well that stirred my parents up. My father could always forgive anyone anything. My mother could not. She held grudges until she died. I hope I take after my father. Anyway, we didn't go to my father's parents house anymore. My father would go, but my mother kept us kids home. God works in mysterious ways. When I was 8 years old I was in church for the funeral of a classmate's father. My paternal grandparents sat right behind me in church. My mother was sitting on the other side of the church. I heard a funny noise, and later learned it was called a death rattle. My grandmother had a stroke; the first one at her side was my mother. My grandmother died in my mothers' arms. After that, my mother and father were the ones who took care of my grandfather. The persons who had stirred up the family fued were not there for him. They wanted to put my grandfather in a nursing home. Nursing homes were not like they are now, or at least what we hope they are. My parents refused, and instead hired an around the clock nurse for him, a care giver. Quillie took care of grandpa for 3 years, 6 days on and 1 day off. When it became to much for her, they hired Willy to help her. Then it became to much for them as well and my mom and dad were there too. My grandfather died 10 years after my grandmother by 1 day, January 17, my grandmother died on January 18. By then I was a freshman in high school.
During this 10 year span, Christmas dinners were held at my parents' home. All were welcome from both sides of the family. Some years there were 30 people. No dishwasher!
More stories to come.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Mama Veldman's story of 4 little chicks
Mama Veldman, my wonderful mother in law, told me stories when we were alone. Henry was always out visiting his brothers and sisters.
One day she was going someplace special, couldn't remember what it was, but you will see why. She had all the children dressed. Pete was the oldest, all of 3 1/2 or 4, Wilhilmein was 2, and Dolly was 1. Riek was the baby. They were all supposed to sit on the bed and wait til she put on her dress and combed her hair. Seems simple enough. Riek being a baby decided to fill her pants. Remember, there were no pampers, plastic pants, or handy wipes. Since mama was in a hurry, the kids decided to help her out. They changed the diaper with pins and poop. Mama said they had poop on all four of them from head to foot. I asked her what she did. She said she just changed their clothes to ordinary clothes and sent them out to play. She only had one good set of clothes for each child.
Imagine cleaning this mess up. No automatic washer and dryer. No bathtub to throw them all in and give them a good soaping. Only one sink in the whole house and it had only cold water. Hot water was in the reserve tank of the stove.
I take my hat off to such a great lady who raised a wonderful brood of 12 chicks during a depression and war time. She did not complain or gripe. She just did the best she could with what was at hand. Food was simple and nourishing and everyone had their fill.
All of the children said how big the house was while they were growing up. Designers today would crack up. The stairss were steep and narrow, the hallway from front to back was narrow,
(that's where they played ping pong). Four boys slept in one room and four girls slept in the other room. The babies slept downstairs in Mama's room.
Toys were almost non existent. Imaginations were used to a very great extent. All grew up happy and loved. More stories to come.
One day she was going someplace special, couldn't remember what it was, but you will see why. She had all the children dressed. Pete was the oldest, all of 3 1/2 or 4, Wilhilmein was 2, and Dolly was 1. Riek was the baby. They were all supposed to sit on the bed and wait til she put on her dress and combed her hair. Seems simple enough. Riek being a baby decided to fill her pants. Remember, there were no pampers, plastic pants, or handy wipes. Since mama was in a hurry, the kids decided to help her out. They changed the diaper with pins and poop. Mama said they had poop on all four of them from head to foot. I asked her what she did. She said she just changed their clothes to ordinary clothes and sent them out to play. She only had one good set of clothes for each child.
Imagine cleaning this mess up. No automatic washer and dryer. No bathtub to throw them all in and give them a good soaping. Only one sink in the whole house and it had only cold water. Hot water was in the reserve tank of the stove.
I take my hat off to such a great lady who raised a wonderful brood of 12 chicks during a depression and war time. She did not complain or gripe. She just did the best she could with what was at hand. Food was simple and nourishing and everyone had their fill.
All of the children said how big the house was while they were growing up. Designers today would crack up. The stairss were steep and narrow, the hallway from front to back was narrow,
(that's where they played ping pong). Four boys slept in one room and four girls slept in the other room. The babies slept downstairs in Mama's room.
Toys were almost non existent. Imaginations were used to a very great extent. All grew up happy and loved. More stories to come.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
How much little ones have to learn
Oct. 27, 2008
I voted today. I went to get an absentee ballot, and you could vote right there and return it. So I did. I had to get a card for dad to sign for him to vote absentee. Two more trips to the city offices. Good thing they are only a half mile away. I am really tired of these elections. Way to much money has been spent by all parties involved. I really thing everyone who wants to run, must present his or her platform before their party's convention. Decide what the party wants to stand for and send it out to all voters to review once a month for 3 months prior to the election. No other ads or campaigning needed. If you cannot read, get someone to read it to you. Use plain English that everyone can understand, in a limited dialog or amount of space.
The money used to campaign could have been used to pay down the national debt. Or feed thousands of people. I do not need to hear the talking heads telling me what I just heard. Granted, it does boost the job market, which sorely needs jobs.
Now A. Greenspan had a very good reason why we are facing this economic mess: GREED.
Not a new concept. It's been around as long as people, and it has been the downfall of many nations. We don't just need a heart, jor a brain, but we do need the courage to follow our conscience. If all those lenders had followed their conscience when lending that money, and all the persons borrowing had used thier brains, we would have a safer financial market. But alas, we are human. Greed is winning out.
Back to where I started: how much little ones have to learn and what we can teach them.
As I have said before, I am teaching 7 year olds in preparation for making their First Communion. This week's unit covered the saints. What is a saint? A martyr? Why and what did they die for? Big concepts for little ones who have everything. It was cute when we had to explain to one little girl what a colored person was. You know, those brown kids in your class at school? That was refreshing, she didn't really see them as any different. Maybe we are making headway in some areas at least. Now if we can decrease poverty and raise the level of education for all children. My group of kids are little chatter boxes. I really love them, and they do want to learn, but listening is not a high priority in their lives. Each week, I seem to get a couple of new kids. They also didn't know about different Protestant religions. It is going to be a fun year.
And where do you start? The history of Religion is a long and harried one for such little persons.
How do you bring it down to their level so they understand and yet are not overwhelmed?
Something to ponder.
Until next time.
I voted today. I went to get an absentee ballot, and you could vote right there and return it. So I did. I had to get a card for dad to sign for him to vote absentee. Two more trips to the city offices. Good thing they are only a half mile away. I am really tired of these elections. Way to much money has been spent by all parties involved. I really thing everyone who wants to run, must present his or her platform before their party's convention. Decide what the party wants to stand for and send it out to all voters to review once a month for 3 months prior to the election. No other ads or campaigning needed. If you cannot read, get someone to read it to you. Use plain English that everyone can understand, in a limited dialog or amount of space.
The money used to campaign could have been used to pay down the national debt. Or feed thousands of people. I do not need to hear the talking heads telling me what I just heard. Granted, it does boost the job market, which sorely needs jobs.
Now A. Greenspan had a very good reason why we are facing this economic mess: GREED.
Not a new concept. It's been around as long as people, and it has been the downfall of many nations. We don't just need a heart, jor a brain, but we do need the courage to follow our conscience. If all those lenders had followed their conscience when lending that money, and all the persons borrowing had used thier brains, we would have a safer financial market. But alas, we are human. Greed is winning out.
Back to where I started: how much little ones have to learn and what we can teach them.
As I have said before, I am teaching 7 year olds in preparation for making their First Communion. This week's unit covered the saints. What is a saint? A martyr? Why and what did they die for? Big concepts for little ones who have everything. It was cute when we had to explain to one little girl what a colored person was. You know, those brown kids in your class at school? That was refreshing, she didn't really see them as any different. Maybe we are making headway in some areas at least. Now if we can decrease poverty and raise the level of education for all children. My group of kids are little chatter boxes. I really love them, and they do want to learn, but listening is not a high priority in their lives. Each week, I seem to get a couple of new kids. They also didn't know about different Protestant religions. It is going to be a fun year.
And where do you start? The history of Religion is a long and harried one for such little persons.
How do you bring it down to their level so they understand and yet are not overwhelmed?
Something to ponder.
Until next time.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
How the hell did I get here anyway?
Well, I found out how much I miss my old job last night. I volunteered to substitute teach ccd class. It was the first night of classes, so utter chaos. The old director of one year is not there anymore and the fill in was really stressed. I had little second graders and they were great. However, we didn't have any books. They were placed in the wrong classroom, duh! All my parents from past years came up and hugged me. Many of my kids were growing up to fast and I missed them all. Just have to keep telling myself I don't have time to teach full time. In my past life, I ran the whole show. And did a fine job I might add.
I missed my favorite meeting of the month because I was teaching. Dad missed the same meeting because he was taking his sister to Canada. I had met his other sister half way from South Bend and we traded off Dolly. Really nice visit in the car for all of us. Dad left his phone at home, so it was a bit dicy for his hook up at the border with Dolly's daughter. They survived, as we all did before cell phones. Next week dad goes to the Purdue/Notre Dame game, but Michael is home, so he won't be able to go to the game with Willy. That has become a fun tradition with the two of them.
Since I usually do this in the middle of the night and it is morning this time, I had better shower and dress. Be good, be safe, and God bless.
I missed my favorite meeting of the month because I was teaching. Dad missed the same meeting because he was taking his sister to Canada. I had met his other sister half way from South Bend and we traded off Dolly. Really nice visit in the car for all of us. Dad left his phone at home, so it was a bit dicy for his hook up at the border with Dolly's daughter. They survived, as we all did before cell phones. Next week dad goes to the Purdue/Notre Dame game, but Michael is home, so he won't be able to go to the game with Willy. That has become a fun tradition with the two of them.
Since I usually do this in the middle of the night and it is morning this time, I had better shower and dress. Be good, be safe, and God bless.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Stewardship
For you non church goers, this is an attempt on the part of the church heirarchy to not only get our money, but also our time and talent. Since I have more time and talent, that is what i give the most to church. Not to mention the fact that I want to know where my money is going. At present we choose to help a single mother feed and clothe her child and get him prepared for a good college education. However, we were very successful getting people to sign up for our booth. I made up my own sign up forms and gave them out. This way we will have the names and email addresses before a year goes by. I already prompted dad to tell the powers that be what we had in mind. We served wine and crackers at our booth since we are Eucharistic Ministers and Decor. We have wine left over and are willing to share.
Dad didn't appreciate me calling those who left church early to come on over and look over all the exhibits. They continued to run to their cars. That fullfilled the one hour per week they owe God.
I am reading this book on the Sistine Chapel and it's secrets. It is factual, not a mystery. Michaelangelo had his problems with the Church heirarchy and he left little hints in the ceiling like little cherubs giving the finger to Pope Julius II. There are many others, but I will let you read the book for yourself.
Dad and I went to a movie Friday night. Ghosttown. Really fun to watch. The British commedian has great lines with tongue in cheek like " I don't mind crowds so much, it's just the people I meet there. Come to think of it, that is a bit how I feel about crowds.
We had planned on going to South Bend for Aunt Fran's 70th birthday party, but dad's tooth abcessed and he has been on antibiotics all week. His cheek was swelled til his left eye was almost closed. I didn't think he had much business driving down to South Bend like that. Then there was the stewardhip fair that we really need to be here for, so I am going down to pick up aunt Dolly at mile marker 121. Aunt Fran will bring her to the restaurant. When I bring her home, dad will take her to Canada and Mary Lou will pick her up at the bridge. Saves Dolly bus fare and we all get to visit with her.Aunt Fran said they all had a good time at the party, as any good Veldman would. "It's a party, bring along a stranger."
Dad didn't appreciate me calling those who left church early to come on over and look over all the exhibits. They continued to run to their cars. That fullfilled the one hour per week they owe God.
I am reading this book on the Sistine Chapel and it's secrets. It is factual, not a mystery. Michaelangelo had his problems with the Church heirarchy and he left little hints in the ceiling like little cherubs giving the finger to Pope Julius II. There are many others, but I will let you read the book for yourself.
Dad and I went to a movie Friday night. Ghosttown. Really fun to watch. The British commedian has great lines with tongue in cheek like " I don't mind crowds so much, it's just the people I meet there. Come to think of it, that is a bit how I feel about crowds.
We had planned on going to South Bend for Aunt Fran's 70th birthday party, but dad's tooth abcessed and he has been on antibiotics all week. His cheek was swelled til his left eye was almost closed. I didn't think he had much business driving down to South Bend like that. Then there was the stewardhip fair that we really need to be here for, so I am going down to pick up aunt Dolly at mile marker 121. Aunt Fran will bring her to the restaurant. When I bring her home, dad will take her to Canada and Mary Lou will pick her up at the bridge. Saves Dolly bus fare and we all get to visit with her.Aunt Fran said they all had a good time at the party, as any good Veldman would. "It's a party, bring along a stranger."
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Stress
Do I know STRESS!
I wonder who would understand stress. Maybe a young woman who looses her first baby and dies on the table to boot.
Who has a baby two years later and her mother dies five months later.
She has a father who has emergency surgery every time she and her family finally go on a short vacation.
When she, her husband and daughter move more than 600 miles to be closer to their families, she finds herself pregnant with a second baby. A great and welcome surprise, just not to timely. Imagine being deathly ill for 9 months, then having a hysterectomy as well as a C-section at the same time. Guess what that does to your hormones.. She doesn't have five months this time before loosing her father, only 9 weeks. Just a week before her father dies, her uncle dies (her father's brother).
Six weeks later she takes her aunt (her mother's sister) to the doctor to be diagnosed with cancer of the throat. Auntie decides against surgery. We all have a free will to make these decisions - her husband was dead, three of her syblings were dead and she had no children. But when push comes to shove, she really doesn't feel like dying,so she signs the papers for surgery. When she wakes up, she is mad as hell. She cannot talk - no voice box. She blames her nephew and his wife for signing for the surgery. By product of throat cancer: cuts off oxygen to the body and the brain. She doesn't remember. After a couple of years hearing how they made her have surgery and she didn't want to live, she found out the truth. She wasn't all that ready to die. Remember this little diatribe is about stress.
The same summer her father's only remaining brother is diagnosed with hodgkins lymphoma. Will this roller coaster ride end soon? He buys time with surgery and is happily around for a few more years.
While all of this is going on, her husbanad helps start a soccer league in South Bend (not just a team). The first year there are 53 kids playing, the second year there are 53 teams. The fact that there are few people who even know what a soccer ball looks like, becomes a problem. Who will coach all these teams? Well the wife with 2 small children and an aunt to care for comes to mind. She can coach a team with her baby in a back pack. Her daughter is on that team of 7 year old boys to make it look like she should be there. Daughter is only 6 and has no interest in playing with boys, so she goes off and picks flowers. Father is busy for his part; he does have a full time job, he coaches 4 teams and he is organizing the league.
In between all of this hub bub, neices and nephews keep getting married, two to three weddings per summer.
Home life must continue in some fashion. Two small children with a gap of 5 years in age creates their own dramas. "He painted my doll?" " I was just operating on it," But add to the mix auntie who takes sides. She has never been to keen on girls, but she loves little boys. Many things will factor into this, but won't be solved until after her death. While she is alive, it just creates STRESS. A stress that she is not willing to suffer in silence.
There are the usual rounds of doctors, meds, and hospital stays. A great extended family helped to care for the children when hospital stays occurred.
The point of all this is simple. (Did I just say that?) We all have stress in our lives, at different times in our lives, caused by different things. How we handle it defines who we are. We all need help from time to time. If you can give the help, thank you. If you can receive the help, please do. It will change your life. If we let ourselves become stressed out, we are no longer any good to ourselves or to others we serve. May God bless all those who serve, in whatever capacity they serve. May they be ever humble in their service and richly rewarded for said service.
Respectfully,
Sissy
I wonder who would understand stress. Maybe a young woman who looses her first baby and dies on the table to boot.
Who has a baby two years later and her mother dies five months later.
She has a father who has emergency surgery every time she and her family finally go on a short vacation.
When she, her husband and daughter move more than 600 miles to be closer to their families, she finds herself pregnant with a second baby. A great and welcome surprise, just not to timely. Imagine being deathly ill for 9 months, then having a hysterectomy as well as a C-section at the same time. Guess what that does to your hormones.. She doesn't have five months this time before loosing her father, only 9 weeks. Just a week before her father dies, her uncle dies (her father's brother).
Six weeks later she takes her aunt (her mother's sister) to the doctor to be diagnosed with cancer of the throat. Auntie decides against surgery. We all have a free will to make these decisions - her husband was dead, three of her syblings were dead and she had no children. But when push comes to shove, she really doesn't feel like dying,so she signs the papers for surgery. When she wakes up, she is mad as hell. She cannot talk - no voice box. She blames her nephew and his wife for signing for the surgery. By product of throat cancer: cuts off oxygen to the body and the brain. She doesn't remember. After a couple of years hearing how they made her have surgery and she didn't want to live, she found out the truth. She wasn't all that ready to die. Remember this little diatribe is about stress.
The same summer her father's only remaining brother is diagnosed with hodgkins lymphoma. Will this roller coaster ride end soon? He buys time with surgery and is happily around for a few more years.
While all of this is going on, her husbanad helps start a soccer league in South Bend (not just a team). The first year there are 53 kids playing, the second year there are 53 teams. The fact that there are few people who even know what a soccer ball looks like, becomes a problem. Who will coach all these teams? Well the wife with 2 small children and an aunt to care for comes to mind. She can coach a team with her baby in a back pack. Her daughter is on that team of 7 year old boys to make it look like she should be there. Daughter is only 6 and has no interest in playing with boys, so she goes off and picks flowers. Father is busy for his part; he does have a full time job, he coaches 4 teams and he is organizing the league.
In between all of this hub bub, neices and nephews keep getting married, two to three weddings per summer.
Home life must continue in some fashion. Two small children with a gap of 5 years in age creates their own dramas. "He painted my doll?" " I was just operating on it," But add to the mix auntie who takes sides. She has never been to keen on girls, but she loves little boys. Many things will factor into this, but won't be solved until after her death. While she is alive, it just creates STRESS. A stress that she is not willing to suffer in silence.
There are the usual rounds of doctors, meds, and hospital stays. A great extended family helped to care for the children when hospital stays occurred.
The point of all this is simple. (Did I just say that?) We all have stress in our lives, at different times in our lives, caused by different things. How we handle it defines who we are. We all need help from time to time. If you can give the help, thank you. If you can receive the help, please do. It will change your life. If we let ourselves become stressed out, we are no longer any good to ourselves or to others we serve. May God bless all those who serve, in whatever capacity they serve. May they be ever humble in their service and richly rewarded for said service.
Respectfully,
Sissy
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